No "Ho-ho-ho!"

Spending Christmas in South Korea was only my second time being away from home for the holidays. My sister, Natalie, and I backpacked Australia for a month during college winter break in 2005. Spending Christmas on the beach in Perth and seeing Santa on the subway was a little different, but so memorable. In fact, I remember receiving a stuffed koala bear from Natalie's friend, Dave, when we arrived in the Melbourne airport on Boxing Day (day after xmas). That little guy sits on my dresser back in the states. Sadly, Dave passed away a few months ago in a tragic accident in Turkey, so the bear leaves me a tad teary but always reminds me of Dave's kindness and hospitality.

At least Christmas is celebrated in Australia.

Here is the series of questions I asked my students regarding their Christmas plans:
hh: Will you open presents tomorrow morning?
students: No.
hh: Santa won't bring you any presents?
students: No Santa.
hh: No Santa in Korea?
students: No.
hh: Ah, yes, Korea's probably too far.
students: (laugh) Yes, too far.
hh: So what about a Christmas tree?
students: No Christmas tree.
hh: Will you have a big dinner?
students: No. Just sit in big room with family.
hh: Wait. No presents... no Santa... no Christmas tree... no dinner?
students: Yes. Go to America, teacher.
hh: (laugh)
students: (laugh)

Sooooo the conclusion here is that there is no Christmas in Korea--not the American way anyway. No decorations (only cheapy $1 crap at Lotte Mart). No gift baskets. No tacky sweaters. They just hang out with family all day. Married or unmarried couples spend the day together too. Oh, and for you single people out there, you hang out with other single people and get really drunk (which doesn't actually sound too bad considering your other option is being locked in a room with your folks). Therefore, a group of Westerners decided we would make our own Christmas here. An engaged couple had about 20 or so people over and cooked us all a huge dinner, which was actually one of the best meals I've ever had. Steamed veggies, salad, mashed potatoes, baked sweet potatoes, stuffing, turkey, short bread cookies, and egg nog! And all this they did with a stove top, microwave, and rice cooker! We played Rob Your Neighbor, and I won a sweet pair of fuzzy rainbow socks. My English friend won a pair of butt implant underwear--funniest and best prize in the pot! Of course we played the usually drinking games--F the dealer and Circle of Death. I recreated high school memories by writing dares on every block of a game of Jenga that someone won in Rob Your Neighbor. We summed up the night by purchasing large quantities of soju and sprite and heading to a norabang (karaoke room) singing the Beatles, Justin Timberlake, and everything in between. Honestly, it was an amazing Christmas. An amazing week.

Of course, I missed seeing you. Seriously, if you are reading this, then you must be someone that actually cares about me. How about next year?

xx
hh

Rock, Paper, Scissors

When you have short hair (I'm learning), it is important to make frequent hair appointments as letting it grow out a couple inches transforms a chic, edgy look into a slobbish mess. Some other Westerners suggested salons where English was well spoken and understood. However, since bus and subway rides were involved, I opted to go to a local shop that is a 5 minute walk from my apartment (including waiting for the elevator and walking up two flights of stairs). Did my laziness pay off? I'd say so. And I got a neat little story out of it too.

So I walk into Juno Hair Salon and am instantly spotted by every Korean in the shop (the norm). A young girl comes to the counter to help me, and I do my normal freeze, stare, purse my lips, and shake my head. I grab a strand of hair and make a sideways peace sign, chopping it with my fingers, and say, "cut?" A young man came over to me and led me to the waiting area. I see a white guy waiting too and think "Thank God. Maybe he can help me. Surely he's done this before." My next thought is, "He'll hear me trying to communicate with them. This is going to be humiliating." I typically don't mind making a fool of myself in front of Koreans because they can't understand what I'm saying anyway. But sounding like an idiot in front of someone that can understand your language... ugh, as if I'm not awkward enough on my own. So this white guy is sitting with a Korean American girl (I know this because she is talking perfect English with an American accent), and I think, "Jackpot!" The young man that seats me starts saying something that ends with "tea." And I did my stare and freeze movement again. He then simply said, "Tea?" I'm still speechless. I'm so used to never understanding Koreans (except at school) that I don't even understand when they are speaking my OWN language to me. I look to my right to the Korean American girl, and ask, "Do you know how to ask for a haircut?" She responds, "Yeah. But he's asking you if you want tea," rolling her eyes on the inside, I'm sure. How stupid can you be? They try to speak English to you and you just give them a blank stare! Now I'm feeling legitimately dumb. You have a college degree. You've traveled the world. Come on. I decline the offer of tea because I feel that I've been a burden enough in making him wait for an answer. A man sits down next to me to discuss what I want with my hair. He has a book in hand, and we flip through it together. I find a couple pictures I like. He sputters some words in English like, "bob cut, short in back, and A-line." I'm thinking we're in business now. This will work. A different young girl washes my hair, adding a bit of a scalp massage in the mix. She brings me back to my hair dresser's chair. He tells me his name is Sun-il, and we chat in broken English, using key words like, "Me. America. Here for 2 months," as I hold up two fingers to make sure he understands. He tells me that his friend lives in Canada and wishes he would move there because there are no good hair dressers in Canada. We laugh. He tells me he dreams small: small city, America, cut hair. I say he should move to St. Louis, and he can cut my hair when I move home. We laugh. All the while he does a funky flip move with the scissors, holding them backwards as he cuts. I do a lot of laughing and alternating between saying, "Yeah," and "Ne," which is Korean for "yes," because giving blank stares don't seem to get me anywhere. He asks me if I want my neck "clean," and I ask him, "green?" He makes a buzzing noise at my neck, and I realize that he's cut it so short that he needs to buzz my neck a bit (not the first time this has happened). He calls for a young man to get his the clippers which are in the cabinet at his station. It's funny--they have hair washers, tea servers, clipper retrievers, and even hair dryers. I tell him I have to leave for work soon so he and another girl blow me dry, he cuts a little more, styles, adds some goop, and brings me to the counter to pay. They give me a card for a 10% discount for my next visit. I try to ad a tip to my card, but the lady ringing me up doesn't understand. I paid 22,000 won, which is something like US$20. Not bad. And, hey, I got a neat little story out of it.

xx
hh

Gamsa hamnida!

... "Thank you!" in Korean.

Happy Thanksgiving! It's clearly not the same in Korea, but we did have a wonderful dinner with some other Americans and Canadians (even though their Thanksgiving was October 10th) this past Sunday with turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, green bean casserole, veggies, fruit, rolls, deviled eggs (David and I brought), pumpkin and apple pie, chocolate mousse, and much more! It's always a good idea to reflect upon the things that you are grateful for on this day, so I've compiled a list. If you are reading this, you will find yourself on it below ;)

What I’m Thankful for in Korea (in no specific order)
1. Kimchi - Spicy cabbage served virtually at every meal, so delicious, I could eat it alone all day, every day.

2. Yumsem - This is our favorite restaurant by far. We literally go there everyday. As I write this, I am digesting an omurice (rice wrapped in an omelet coated with a red/brownish sauce and mustard). They have very cheap kimbap as well, about 2500 won per roll (less than $2.50). Kimbap is the Korean version of sushi. They put yellow radish and a strange brown stringy vegetable instead of avocado and cucumber. There’s also egg, ham, and rice in there, wrapped in seaweed. My favorite is, of course, kimchi kimbap.

3. Crosswalks - Cars (well, the people inside of them) don’t follow any real rules of the road. Lines? Forget ‘em. Stop at a red light? Neh, just honk your horn as you pass through. Crosswalks are the only way to go to get across the street - but you still gotta look both ways ;)

4. Etude House - A cute little shop with make-up, nail polish, and scented sprays and soaps. It’s pretty cheap--drugstore prices for the most part--and the body sprays are scrumptious. It’s kind of like Sephora, where you can test out everything, which, of course, I do.

5. Poped Corn - Now, you’re probably thinking, “poped” corn? Holly, don’t you mean “popped” corn? Nope, it’s on the bag: Poped Corn. It’s actually not even popcorn. It’s a lot like the cereal Pops, and it is so freaking good, great with milk even though it’s in the snack isle. We also really like the typo, that makes it more special.

6. Galbi - There is a place that is a 2500 won cab ride away that is 8900 won all-you-can-eat galbi (barbeque). You grab meats, veggies, rice, etc., from the buffet and sit around a grill at your table and cook it yourself. Put a little rice, meat, toasted garlic, and hot sauces onto a piece of lettuce and eat it as a wrap. Divine. This place also has a pumpkin porridge that is unlike anything I’ve ever tasted. It’s clumpy, and it’s yellow, and it’s sweet and steamy--yum!

7. My cleaning lady - aka David. It’s pretty awesome to come home from work to a clean house and clean clothes. Oh, and it’s also nice to come home to my best friend.

What I’m Not So Thankful for in Korea
1. Stares - Sometimes I want to look ugly. I don’t want to wear make-up. I want to wear pj’s outside of my apartment. But then some Korean will think that ALL Americans are unkempt slobs. I know they are watching. On the other hand, it's pretty adorable when little kids wave and yell hi from far away to get our attention. Today, while David and I were on an exploration walk (one where we just wander and make random turns, not knowing where it’ll lead us), a little girl dressed in all pink stared up at David (who is 6’4”) as she approached us, as she passed us, and after we walked by. Her mouth was wide open. Those are cherished moments.

2. Not being able to speak Korean - I’m working on the alphabet right now. I know 8 vowels, so I can read approximately 1/5 of the language. Imagine if you could only read 1/5 of a sign or a menu--it doesn’t really work. Give me time. I will never be able to speak it, but I know lots of key phrases: yes, no, give me please, thank you, hello, goodbye, here, come here please, really?, hooray, I love you, and of course, various foods like kimbap, bulgogi, dongas, galbi, etc. The upside to this is that David and I can talk really fast in English and pretty much no one will understand a thing we said. So if I don't like someone's shoes sitting next to me on the subway, I can say, "David, the person sitting next to me has wretched shoes." Then again, I could be talking about David. Also, this would never happen because everyone has nice shoes here.

Things I Miss in America

1. Family, friends, and Lucy and Louie (and Copper, I guess)

2. Supernanny and Clean House - I was watching these two shows obsessively on TV for about a month or so before I left. Two great lessons learned: Do not have children unless you are willing to raise them. Do not keep shit you don’t need.

3. A Soft Bed - Our bed here is like a wooden board. A thin layer of cloth separates rows of stiff metal springs. I keep thinking that I’ll get used to it, but every morning I wake up and can’t move my neck. I miss memory foam.

4. Honey Nut Cheerios + Fiber One + Sliced Bananas + Blueberries = The reason to get up in the morning - I can get Cheerios at Costco, but I’m not sure how much they’ll cost. Cereal here is quite pricey and the large grocery store we go to doesn’t have a huge selection--maybe 12-- and they are things like Fruit Loops, Cocoa Crisp, and Frosted Flakes, all written in Korean and many with their own Korean cartoon characters. I’m making due with a box of Frosted Flakes with Almonds.

xx
hh

P.S. Linnea, if you read these SO often to occupy yourself at work, why aren't you my follower? Huh?!

Corporal Punishment

From what I've heard, corporal punishment is an accepted and expected form of discipline in schools in Korea--from Korean teachers, not Westerners. Students understand that if they misbehave, that's the consequence--a good whipping. There are even special rooms in public schools for it. Hogwons (English schools) are a little different, less strict for sure.

I was, to say the least, shocked at the corporal punishment received by a student from the principal last week. In the middle of class, a student shouted out, "F*@& you, f*@& you, f*@& you," --not AT anyone, just said it aloud. This child is notorious for misbehaving. I sent him to the hall to do his work because I knew that the principal would see him there and would come investigate. A knock on my door five minutes later, and there she was. When she asked why he was there, I told her that he said "F you, f you, f you," and she seemed confused. I cupped my hand and whispered into her eye what the F stood for. She yelled, "F*@& you, f*@& you, f*@&??????" in front of the entire class. I went wide-eyed. I didn't exactly expect that! She proceeded to smack him on the arm and yell some Korean at him. The student laughed, she laughed, and then she kicked him on the rear and thigh, and yelled some more Korean. It was more of a playful scolding than a beating. It worked. He behaved for the rest of class.

Why can't we do this in America?

So this happens quite a lot here, and I'm not exactly sure how I feel about it. I know there are gobs of studies out there that say violence to a child has lasting negative effects that linger into adulthood. But crime is Korea is extremely low. So is smacking/whipping/spanking a misbehaving student all that bad if it works? Especially if it's accepted in your culture? I don't know, but I do know I'm not willing to give it a go.

xx
hh

"If I wasn't a Celebrity...

would you be so nice to me?" Yes, I just quoted an old yet amazing N*Sync song. Don't judge me. I highly suggest spending some time on youtube watching some old videos from them... it's great comic relief.

"Celebrity" is the topic of this blog. The only qualification for celebrity status here is white skin. If you do not enjoy being stared at constantly, then I recommend that you stay out of Korea. Example: In the subway station on Saturday evening, two young girls (13/14 years old) went wide-eyed when they saw me, giggled, covered their mouths in embarrassment, and waved at me. I just side-smiled awkwardly, looked around, realized they were looking at ME, and waved back. Is this what it's like to be Miley Cyrus?

I don't know how I feel about all this. On one hand, I feel flattered by the stares, and since I'm talentless in all areas of life, this might be the only fame I ever get. On the other hand, it's week two. This will get old. Soon.

xx
hh

Image: a sweatshirt I found in Dongdaemun markets on Saturday evening. I was disappointed that I hadn't bought anything yet and said to David, "Nothing really has caught my eye--" And literally as I said "eye," I spotted this sweatshirt. Holly AND St. Louis on the same piece of clothing in KOREA--if I believed in fate, I'd say I was destined to be here.

Teacha, teacha!

Teacha, teacha - n, what students shout at me when they want to tell me something.

Today, I'm going to talk about teaching here in Korea, so it is fitting that I am currently sitting in the computer lab at my school. You are probably thinking, "Why are you in a computer lab when you could be at your desk computer in your classroom?" Well, while I do have a desk, I do not have a classroom that I call my own. There is a teacher's lounge with desks where two teachers face each other and work. They aren't gigantic by any means, but they do just fine for the work I need to get completed. I had so many extra teacher supplies from home, so I brought some with me and keep them in my little desk drawer. If you ever had the pleasure of seeing my awesome classroom in the U.S., then you might think I was a little disappointed with not being able to put my unique touch on a classroom. Actually, it is so much simpler this way. I carry the books I need to teach with, my planner, and attendance sheets plus a pencil, pen, and dry erase marker (and of course a diet drink of some sort--because I do not function correctly without a heavy dose of caffeine). There is no straightening up desks, picking up trash or pencils--just erase what you wrote on the board for the next teacher. I've never had my desk be so clean! It's nice! When it comes to the teaching part, it's a little complicated, but I'm sure you can follow. Some classes I see once a week, some I see twice, and other I see three times--it just depends on what I'm teaching. I teach lots of different areas--listening, storytime (reading), and writing. For example, I see two of my 6th grade classes three times a week. Mondays and Fridays, I teach storytime (we are reading The Merchant of Venice by William Shakespeare). On Wednesdays, I teach writing (which is brutally boring). There are 4th graders that I see only on Fridays, and we do listening time. Storytime really is just reading the story, writing definitions for the vocabulary used in the chapter we read that day, and answering questions about the story. That stuff I have to prepare myself. The rest of my classes have workbooks where I just follow the directions in the book and help the kids through it all.

My favorite class by far is a group of kindergarten/1st graders that I teach phonics to. I posted pictures of a couple of them on facebook--the twins, Jinny and Amy, and another girl, Nicole, are my favorite three little kids. There is a girl named Lucy who I informed has the same name as my dog at home (if you've been reading my blog or know me at all, then you know that I am a little obsessed with my dog), and she just thought it was the coolest thing. I should mention that these are not the students' real names; they get to choose an "English" name. Other student names include: Lisa and John (my parents' names), Louie (my other dog's name), Andy, Jenny, Rachel, Matt, Cindy, Mary, Jack, and of course--Kevin! I think I have 10 Kevins. Oh, and I have another kid named Doodlez. He is neat. Yesterday, I informed him what his name means--doodles are little drawings that people make in the margin of their paper (obviously not limited to just that). He was fascinated by that. A girl named Lisa from that same class (which is my favorite 6th grade class) stares at me a lot--she says she likes my nose and wants plastic surgery--haha.

Overall, I really like teaching here. I don't have to take ANYthing home to grade. In fact, I don't do any grading period. When I check their homework (which is usually writing vocabulary words or completing a worksheet), I just make sure that it's finished. I've been informed that my sole purpose here is for the students to hear a native English speaker. I definitely have a curriculum to follow, and I always give my best, but the pressure and stress to be perfect (mostly self-inflicted) is not nearly what it was at home.

It's nice to take a moment to breathe for once. I can finally be a little selfish.

xx
hh

Image above: My first picture from a student. Julie-1 (there are two Julie's in the class) drew the character Portia on the wrong side of the sheet.
Thx to Owl City for helping me stay focused while writing this. I heart you lots.

Annyung Haseyo!

“Annyung haseyo” from Korea! I’m finally getting used to saying “hello” in Korean to people I meet. At first I was a little hesitant because I wasn’t sure I was saying it right, but with a little help from my students, I’ve got it down. It’s easy: ‘Annyung’ (also written as annyeong) is basically like saying ‘year’ in Spanish-- ano (not sure how to make the squiggle over the n). And haseyo is said just as it’s written. Now you can say hello in Korean too!

This trip started off in the most disastrous of ways. David wrote about it in his blog, so I’ll let you go to that to get the full story (davidwalburn.blogspot.com). Basically, we missed our flight out of St. Louis to Chicago, and I freaked out, as usual, because that’s what I do in stressful situations. Then, a lady from United Airlines put us on an American Airlines flight to San Francisco so that we would make our flight to Seoul. And they did not charge us! Just so you know, that is completely unheard of! Our travel agent said that he has never in his 20 years experience had an airline book someone on a competitor’s flight for free. I chalk it up to my patheticness: I was sitting on the floor outside the gate crying and nearly hyperventilating, my bags sprawled out around me. Then, I ran to the nearest trashcan and dry heaved a couple times. Yeah, people were staring. But I think that might have something to do with why we made it to Seoul--because I’m so dramatic :) I hope, by now, you are laughing at me.

On the flight from St. Louis to San Fran, we looked around, and there were no open seats. How did we get on this flight only an hour and a half before it took off?? Were there really only 2 seats left?? Wow.

Now we’re on the plane to Seoul, exhausted, shaking our heads at each other, saying, “Can you believe the morning we had?” Our next worry is now whether or not David will get into the country without a visa. We took the necessary precautions: he booked a flight to Shanghai for January (bc he has to leave the country within 90 days) and he printed off his bank statement to prove he has “sufficient funds” to stay. We decide to just not worry yet. The food was pretty good--all Asian of course. We had a beer each and played Gin Rummy. I made risky moves by picking up large piles of high-valued cards, and soon after David would go out, so I was negative 65 points after two games. We decided to stop keeping score. I watched “My Sister’s Keeper,” “Night at the Museum 2,” parts of “The Hangover” and “The Proposal” and the same damn episode of “The Simpsons” a handful of times. Did lots of sleeping too, which was nice since I only slept for about 2 and a half hours the previous night. Jitters, maybe.

The flight attendant paged us over the PA when we landed. Our bags didn’t make our flight, and they wouldn’t arrive until 9 PM the following day (that’s about 27 hours after we landed). And they would be delivered to our apartment around midnight of that day. They were put on a flight from San Fran to Tokyo to Seoul--so my clothes have been to Japan--kinda cool. Why do I feel like Korea doesn't want me here?

We made it through customs fine. We switched lines, thinking that we’d make it through faster. Nope, we chose the slowest line. I mean, this lady must have needed a coffee break or something, she was a snail. I just can't win today. I went through first and was allowed into the country--yes! Next was David, and boy, was I nervous. Success!

There was a man waiting with a sign with my name on it outside the gate at the airport. He led us outside to the taxi/limousine. I breathed in a big gulp of Korean air, and shouted, “Yay! Korea! I’m here!” The taxi driver apparently didn’t know where to take us. Really? What else could go wrong at this point!? He hands me a phone and says, “Speak.” Oh geez, he doesn’t speak English. There is another man on the other end who tries to figure out where to take me, and he speaks English. We made a random stop and picked up what the taxi driver called his “friend.” All right, then. For the entire drive, the taxi driver has the “Fast and the Furious” playing on his GPS (which is so much more high tech than what we have), and I watched him take a few peeks at the screen while we were on the highway. A little scary.

We arrived to our apartment fine, and a man from the school named Park was there to meet us. The girl who I replaced had not moved out. Her things were packed, but not out of the apartment. So we left our bags (just carry-ons) in the bathroom and headed for the school. It is very close, about a block away on the other side of the street from our apartment. It takes less than 5 minutes to get from the fifth floor of our building (where we live) to the fourth floor of the school--that includes waiting for two elevators and crossing at a crosswalk (because jaywalking is practically the leading cause of death in this country).

When we got to Kang Tae Woo English Academy, a lady sat us down and explained that if we were feeling sick, she would take us to the hospital the next day. That is the very first thing she says, so that gives me a clue that swine flu is kind of a big deal here. My next clue comes days later when I see little children with decorated cloth masks on. Do you like pink with yellow stars? Maybe powder blue with clouds is more your style? They marketed the sh*t out of this pandemic. Very Smart. Anyway, then she tells me that I’m starting teaching tomorrow. What?! I was so jetlagged and delirious, I just kind of nodded so she’d stop talking, and I could get out of there and go to bed! I literally couldn’t think or process any information. I met my coworkers--two Canadians and an American (Hawaiian). The girl I replaced left me her lesson plans for the week, so that was really nice to have something to jump off from. We went back home (weird to call Korea home now) and went straight to sleep.

If you made it through all that rambling, thanks for sticking it out! I’ll write next about our first few days: the incredible food we’ve had and teaching in Korea--stay tuned ya’ll!

Xx
hh

I'm Probably Going to Miss You

As I chopped up black olives for our family taco dinner tonight, the reality that I'm not going to see any of my family or friends really hit me hard. There was so much planning and packing that kept my mind occupied for weeks and months. Tears are flowin...

Since being home and jobless, I've grown very "close" to my dogs--it's quite devastating that I have to leave them. Living in Columbia for 6 years, I obviously didn't see them all that much--in fact, during the 08-09 school year, I came home maybe 4 or 5 times. But I always knew I could see them if I wanted. :(

I'm also really concerned that something is going to happen to someone while I'm away--death, accident, just something bad. So everyone needs to be really careful so that I can stop worrying.

Two funny things happened to me yesterday: On the highway, some guy driving behind me was wearing a white mask (phantom of the opera-like) and staring at the ppl in the cars next to him. Before this, he was passing me, then letting me pass him--somewhere around 30 times--and staring at me--maskless. Freak.
Second thing, at the bar down the street last night, some 50+ woman was trashed and slipped and stumbled... totally face-planted in my brother's crotch. She braced herself with her hand...in my brother's crotch. We laughed. He felt violated, and rightfully so.

Leaving tomorrow morning--18 hr trip. The flight from San Francisco to Seoul is 13 hours--bring on the tylenol pm.

xx
hh

Lucy in the Suitcase with Diamonds

One of my mini dachshunds, Lucy, has been keeping me company all day as I pack for Korea. She literally follows me into my closet as I grab more clothes and then sits on my lap as I fold and pack them. As I lay on my bedroom floor typing this on my laptop, she is sitting between my arms and blocking me from seeing the screen. As I dodge from left to right, she mimics me, wanting to give me little kisses. If you've ever had the pleasure of meeting Lucy, then you know how truly sweet and loving this tiny 12-lb darling is.

What's the limit on how many pairs of shoes to bring? When I studied in Australia in 2005, I brought eleven. I have too much stuff! But if you walked into my closet right now, you wouldn't know that I've already packed everything I want out of there. That's sick. When did I get this selfish? (When I got my first paycheck???:)

Thanks to pandora.com stations: John Mayer, Ingram Hill, and Amos Lee, and to some faves on myspace.com for keeping me sane today. Big thanks to Diet Dr. Pepper as well, I love you.

xx

hh